Comments on: How To Tell Your Husband “No” to Anal Sex http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/ My Gagazine Journal Fri, 12 Mar 2010 15:49:30 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.3 By: geebee http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-14 geebee Mon, 10 Mar 2008 23:17:10 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-14 Having the courage to ask for something you want is part of being an adult, Lee. Being told 'no' and accepting it, is also part of being an adult. Imagine if HE isn't getting what he wants, do you think SHE is, either? Communication--clear, concise communication keeps relationships fresh and exciting, in and out of the bedroom. The bottom line of the story is this: Communication is key. Threatening to take one's sexual activity outside of the marriage is a form of control. Would you honestly want your sexual partner to do something that he/she was appalled by? How gratifying would that be to you? Having the courage to ask for something you want is part of being an adult, Lee. Being told ‘no’ and accepting it, is also part of being an adult.
Imagine if HE isn’t getting what he wants, do you think SHE is, either?

Communication–clear, concise communication keeps relationships fresh and exciting, in and out of the bedroom.

The bottom line of the story is this: Communication is key. Threatening to take one’s sexual activity outside of the marriage is a form of control. Would you honestly want your sexual partner to do something that he/she was appalled by? How gratifying would that be to you?

]]> By: juicyfruit http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-13 juicyfruit Mon, 10 Mar 2008 04:38:33 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-13 This obviously has become a battle of the sexist. Women feel that they need to be respected while men feel that their wild fantasies must be met. "...I don’t know if he asked me a dozen times because he really wanted to try it, or if he was starting to find it entertaining that I was getting more and more upset everytime he asked..." Perhaps he was really just asking her purposely to piss her off. Knowing how she would respond, he could be pissing her off as some kind of entertainment for the weekend. Lee, in regards to your "keep your sex life between you and your husband" comment, I understand that your sex life is personal but if the mom and the daughter are good friends, what is the issue? It's just like telling your best friend about it. I know for a fact that friends share these types of stories with each other. So what makes it different between a daughter and mother? Are you telling me that men don't talk about it to their friends? And besides, do you really think a good relationship is based on sex? I agree that it is an important element of a good marriage, but if that's the reason for the husband to cheat on his wife and run off to marry his call girl, then was it a good marriage? This obviously has become a battle of the sexist. Women feel that they need to be respected while men feel that their wild fantasies must be met.

“…I don’t know if he asked me a dozen times because he really wanted to try it, or if he was starting to find it entertaining that I was getting more and more upset everytime he asked…”

Perhaps he was really just asking her purposely to piss her off. Knowing how she would respond, he could be pissing her off as some kind of entertainment for the weekend.

Lee, in regards to your “keep your sex life between you and your husband” comment, I understand that your sex life is personal but if the mom and the daughter are good friends, what is the issue? It’s just like telling your best friend about it. I know for a fact that friends share these types of stories with each other. So what makes it different between a daughter and mother? Are you telling me that men don’t talk about it to their friends?

And besides, do you really think a good relationship is based on sex? I agree that it is an important element of a good marriage, but if that’s the reason for the husband to cheat on his wife and run off to marry his call girl, then was it a good marriage?

]]> By: Lee Evans http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-12 Lee Evans Sun, 09 Mar 2008 21:34:04 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-12 I do not want to play the devils advocate here but I don\'t see where this is a form of control. He may have been wanting to try this for awhile and finally got the courage to ask. After it being said that he really would like to try it. Asking again and again he was letting her know that he was getting tired of the usual and wanted something different. You know that old saying if he is\'nt getting what he wants at home he can get it somewhere else. What might be perverted for some is an exciteing sex life for others and it has nothing to do with being gay, so is having oral sex being gay to?, Do you know that in early days couples used this as a form of birth control and others used it as a way to save a girls virginity until marriage. trying something different which may be naughty may be exciteing to your husband and might keep him from straying for some kinky fun under the covers with someone else.Does he ever do anything for you that he don\'t want to but does because you want it? After reading a story awhile back about Call-Girls married men said they go to callgirls because they are not getting what they want at home. As for the comment about going to your mother about it my jaw dropped, I could see why she replied what she did back then the thought of turning the lights on or having oral sex was a discusting thing to, and unless you refuse oral sex to your husband and mom has gave you that advice also I would keep your sex life between you and your husband. Marriage is a bond of two people coming together as one and that don\'t include mom. I do not want to play the devils advocate here but I don\’t see where this is a form of control. He may have been wanting to try this for awhile and finally got the courage to ask. After it being said that he really would like to try it. Asking again and again he was letting her know that he was getting tired of the usual and wanted something different. You know that old saying if he is\’nt getting what he wants at home he can get it somewhere else. What might be perverted for some is an exciteing sex life for others and it has nothing to do with being gay, so is having oral sex being gay to?, Do you know that in early days couples used this as a form of birth control and others used it as a way to save a girls virginity until marriage. trying something different which may be naughty may be exciteing to your husband and might keep him from straying for some kinky fun under the covers with someone else.Does he ever do anything for you that he don\’t want to but does because you want it? After reading a story awhile back about Call-Girls married men said they go to callgirls because they are not getting what they want at home. As for the comment about going to your mother about it my jaw dropped, I could see why she replied what she did back then the thought of turning the lights on or having oral sex was a discusting thing to, and unless you refuse oral sex to your husband and mom has gave you that advice also I would keep your sex life between you and your husband. Marriage is a bond of two people coming together as one and that don\’t include mom.

]]> By: juicyfruit http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-10 juicyfruit Sat, 08 Mar 2008 21:16:25 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-10 This story is not about anal sex, as geebee mentioned. It's about the husband not respecting the wife's decision to try something new. Although she blatantly said no, he continues to ask. He still asks her even after he is annoyed with him. The fact that she didn't talk to him the entire weekend should have given the hint that he pissed her off and should have apologized. But we all know that some men can be dense, right? This story is not about anal sex, as geebee mentioned. It’s about the husband not respecting the wife’s decision to try something new. Although she blatantly said no, he continues to ask. He still asks her even after he is annoyed with him. The fact that she didn’t talk to him the entire weekend should have given the hint that he pissed her off and should have apologized. But we all know that some men can be dense, right?

]]> By: geebee http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-9 geebee Sat, 08 Mar 2008 01:50:23 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-9 Then, without passing judgment on others, just say "no". The real point of this story isn't about anal sex; it's about a man who refused to respect his wife's boundaries--much more serious, to me, than his desire to try anal sex. If you are in a sexual relationship with someone who wants to dominate you, then you own half of the problem. Then, without passing judgment on others, just say “no”.

The real point of this story isn’t about anal sex; it’s about a man who refused to respect his wife’s boundaries–much more serious, to me, than his desire to try anal sex.

If you are in a sexual relationship with someone who wants to dominate you, then you own half of the problem.

]]> By: Joy http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-8 Joy Sat, 08 Mar 2008 00:26:08 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-8 I totally agree with this.. Anal sex is disgusting. I don't want anything going in that end. I think anal sex isn't just associated with homosexuals. It is associated with someone wanting to dominate someone else. I think it would be a frightening and humiliating act to through. I find nothing sexually appealing to having someone shove his penis in the hole I use to pass crap... I totally agree with this.. Anal sex is disgusting. I don’t want anything going in that end. I think anal sex isn’t just associated with homosexuals. It is associated with someone wanting to dominate someone else. I think it would be a frightening and humiliating act to through. I find nothing sexually appealing to having someone shove his penis in the hole I use to pass crap…

]]> By: LB http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-5 LB Sat, 08 Mar 2008 00:22:23 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-5 I agree with geebee, personally. If you don't want to try it, that's fine, but there's no need to bring negative stereotypes and homophobia into the mix. I agree with geebee, personally. If you don’t want to try it, that’s fine, but there’s no need to bring negative stereotypes and homophobia into the mix.

]]> By: geebee http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-4 geebee Thu, 06 Mar 2008 03:51:48 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-4 "...anal sex is usually associated with homosexuals..." It's also associated with people who are in loving, trusting relationships, and are NOT homosexual. It's also associated with people who are adventurous, curious, uninhibited, and not prejudiced. I would be far more concerned about my partner's obvious unwillingness to accept my response, than his desire to try something new in the bedroom. “…anal sex is usually associated with homosexuals…”

It’s also associated with people who are in loving, trusting relationships, and are NOT homosexual. It’s also associated with people who are adventurous, curious, uninhibited, and not prejudiced.

I would be far more concerned about my partner’s obvious unwillingness to accept my response, than his desire to try something new in the bedroom.

]]> By: jeff http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-3 jeff Wed, 05 Mar 2008 04:57:15 +0000 http://journals.gagazine.com/juicyfruit/how-to-tell-your-husband-no-to-anal-sex/#comment-3 Sorry to hear about this... your colleague has missed out! Sorry to hear about this… your colleague has missed out!

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